Summa Cum Nihil

The Peak of Nothing

539 notes

girlnamedgoober:

mamaswears:

onestarbookreview:

“At some point, the tree should have started singing Janet Jackson’s ‘What Have You Done for Me Lately?’ and dropping apples on the human’s head”

Wee bit o’ early Truthful Tuesday: I HATE THE GIVING TREE.

I have never read any of his books but people tell he is a must read.

It’s never too early to teach your kids that humans are selfish assholes, themselves included.

girlnamedgoober:

mamaswears:

onestarbookreview:

“At some point, the tree should have started singing Janet Jackson’s ‘What Have You Done for Me Lately?’ and dropping apples on the human’s head”

Wee bit o’ early Truthful Tuesday: I HATE THE GIVING TREE.

I have never read any of his books but people tell he is a must read.

It’s never too early to teach your kids that humans are selfish assholes, themselves included.

6 notes

http://grainsnooker.tumblr.com/post/98765233047/mogatrat-no-one-i-know-has-ever-had-their-car

grainsnooker:

mogatrat:

no one i know has ever had their car keyed, and as far as i can tell its exclusively the problem of people who park expensive cars badly

can anyone confirm this

i once keyed the words ‘fuck yourself’ into a guy’s truck because he threw a rock at me in the parking lot (he was a…

My car was keyed when I was a senior in high school. Some juniors did it as a prank, thinking it was the car of a guy in my class. We both drove ancient hand-me-down Volvos. Mine was a charcoal gray 760 Turbo, and his was a navy 740 Turbo. But yeah, he was an asshole, so I guess they thought they were showing him. 

326,682 notes

bakrua:

bewbin:

Why do people drink alcohol it tastes disgusting

you don’t drink it for the taste. u drink shit like apple juice for the taste. you drink alcohol to get rid of the bad taste that every awful person in your life has left

And toddlers.

(via grainsnooker)

1 note

Remember when I used to write stuff on Tumblr? Jeez. I just spent the last week and a half writing up teaching, service, and scholarship essays for performance review at work. My brain is fried, and I am convinced that I am going to fail utterly at getting promoted and tenured in five years.